DeanoVilla
One Bloody Number
We don't want anyone without experience but we don't want someone with too much experience either.
We don't want anyone too old or anyone too young.
We don't want anyone too English or too foreign.
Nobody wants a fatty despite almost all of us being overweight.
We want someone calm and smart but who also rants and raves on the side lines.
This should be a piece of cake (we don't want anyone who likes cake).
Shame Gareth Southgate has just signed an extension with England... he fits your bill.