I just bought some new "Harry & Meghan" condoms. They are not the only Royal Contraceptive on sale though - you can also buy photos of Camilla for your headboard.
My mate told me his missus was out so he showered went to bed, knob in one hand whilst popping the DVD he got off E-Bay into the DVD player. He laid back ready to watch "Bald and Barely Legal" only spend the next 40 minutes watching a documentry on tyre wear.
A doctor looks at recently deceased patient and asks, “What were his final words?” The nurse replies, “None, Doctor his wife was with him to the very end.”
I’m now absolutely convinced that the BBC are totally out of touch with their audience. They’ve just announced that people won’t need a TV license to watch the Royal wedding.
How the fuck does that benefit anyone in Liverpool?