Shouldn’t laugh | Page 59 | Vital Football

Shouldn’t laugh

****True facts****

1. In the 1400s a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.

Hence we have 'the rule of thumb.'

2. Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...

Ladies Forbidden'... and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

3. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:

Spades - King David,

Hearts - Charlemagne,

Clubs -Alexander the Great,

Diamonds - Julius Caesar

4. In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.'

5. It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink.

Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.

6. Since 1990, Sheffield Wednesday🐷🐷 fans have said they are going to win the league at the start of every football season, hence the phrase ‘deluded twat’.
 
Bulmer1889 said:
****True facts****

1. In the 1400s a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.

Hence we have 'the rule of thumb.'

2. Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...

Ladies Forbidden'... and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

3. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:

Spades - King David,

Hearts - Charlemagne,

Clubs -Alexander the Great,

Diamonds - Julius Caesar

4. In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.'

5. It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink.

Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.

6. Since 1990, Sheffield Wednesday🐷🐷 fans have said they are going to win the league at the start of every football season, hence the phrase ‘deluded twat’.
Click to expand...
Come on number 6 is ludicrous.
 
So was at a bar last night and saw this fat chick wearing a shirt that said "Caution, I'm a maneater". I walked up to the girl and timidly said "Excuse me, Miss... about your shirt". She interrupted me before I could continue and furiously shouted "Oh let me guess, you're here to make a comment about how I'm so fat and how I actually eat men. I can't help my weight you know. I have feelings too and your comments can really hurt". I looked at her, confused and said "That's actually not what I was going to say at all". "Oh..." she replied as a smile started to come across her face. "What were you going to say?" "That's not how you spell manatee".
 
You must log in or register to reply here.