none football.....kids. | Vital Football

none football.....kids.

B

Birdys

Vital 1st Team Regular
Reg Bailey has raised some interesting points, i think, regarding the amount of time we spend chatting to our kids. We are, allegedly, the most likely in Europe to neglect our kids with regard to discussion.
Whilst i have little experience of other European Countries i do think that the families i am close to don't spend enough time engaging with each other....
 
A bit contradictory Mr B. :17:

We're all the same, why communicate by the gob when we can do it using our fingers. If not by text then with the 1 fingered salute.

Im always telling the kids off for not speaking to their friends when they have them round for tea or whatever. It's because they message them. When they're IN THE SAME ROOM!! For fucks sake.

What's life gonna be like in 25 years?

A life where everyone just stays in bed and 'dream-thinks' their way through the day?
 
So important to converse with kids and get them thinking and seeking knowledge - what's happening to the social media generation makes me despair. Latest research that will be coming out soon suggests it's a double impact in that parents themselves are spending significant parts of their time together on social media whilst kids are learning how to develop relationships online but without face to face contact or individual guidance from their folks. If anyone's seen Wall-e, that whole idea of humans ferried around on hovering chairs with all their life carried out via a screen is only a little more complacency away. My sons mates were all shocked to fuck when I made conversation with them when they first came round. Sure the fellas on here really parent their kids but the fact is there's a growing number who get hardly any one to one parenting at home- and those fuckers are breeding too. It's all the fucking path of least resistance and it'll get worse unless something intervenes.
 
"A life where everyone just stays in bed and 'dream-thinks' their way through the day?"

Did you watch the Matrix ?
 
I pride myself on facilitating communication between my kids and others.

Just last week, my son asked me if he could have a lift to Ripon next Tuesday. I told to ask his mother if she could take him.
 
AMac - 25/8/2014 19:35

"A life where everyone just stays in bed and 'dream-thinks' their way through the day?"

Did you watch the Matrix ?
Click to expand...

Aye. Cracking trilogy.

I would have said that something like that would be possible in my lifetime but with everything that's went on recently, we can't even predict for certain that we'll be here next week.
 
When my bairn was little I used to turn off the TV for weeks at a time during the holidays. I was fortunate enough to be a stay at home dad for a good long while, and I'd spend hours just messing about. Totally non structured play, we did whatever we fancied. I didn't give a fuck about grades, or school reports, or any of that. We read to each other, and I would fuck about and pretend I didn't understand so that she would have to explain things. We could go out for the day, and pretend to be different folks. She loved it. Now, she is a successful artist, reads about a million books a week, and is full of laughter. She goes weeks without checking her Facebook account, much to the chagrin of her addicted friends. I put it down to removing the TV, which to my mind is like having a stranger in the room, who is liable to shout out any old shite at any time.

Throw away your TVs, that's my advice to anyone with kids.
 
Stiil consider myself a bit old school when it comes to this shit,especially round meal times.All electrical devices switched off even when my kids who are 27 & 29 come for scran & the two of the first words they uttered were please & thankyou.Think it's paramount that kids have the ability to converse but also listening skills.Am finding there's a new generation of fuckers who only live in the me,me,me world & wouldn't know what a conversation was if it slapped em in the face.
 
Spot on, both of you. Get them out of their rooms for a decent chunk of time and spend time talking to and engaging with them and it's amazing how lovely and inspiring some young kids can be- and I've met far more kids who want to be spoken to than don't.
 
Aye,Carlos "It's amazing how lovely and inspiring some kids can be".Was down at the banks of the Tyne yesterday with my eldests partners kid 3yr old,felt a bit like learning how to fly,football ,fishing net,water pistol & craic.Worked as a play worker for 17 years & learnt the value of play.Our back lane has been like a ghost-town the past 5 weeks.Most of em either in macdonalds or the fuckin metro centre,makes my heart bleed.Am having my first grandbairn end of October,little lass & carrying her up the fells at the first opportunity.
 
I don't want to sound all 'tree huggy & new age' (i ain't) but i do believe that our children are the greatest opportunity most of us have to make the world a better place. I was relatively old (35) when we had our first but it was a great pleasure & surprise to me how much both our kids responded to the simple basics, love, caring and structure. I'm far from the perfect parent, in fact i did say, the other week, that if we had produced 20 kids i would still be making the same mistakes with number 20.
Mrs Bs sister & hubby have a 4 yo and it thoroughly depresses me the amount of time both parents spend on their phones (DOING WHAT!!) when out rather than engaging with their child. There's no wonder the poor little bugger clings to Mrs B like glue.
its all v sad.
 
Get out and about with your kids. Do stuff with them. Last week we built water rockets: empty pop bottle, rubber tube, cardboard flights, sticky tape, bung with a hole in it, bike pump and water. 3 kids utterly involved for a whole day. Experimented with different amount of water to work out the best combinations. Not bad for 7,6 and 3 year olds.

However, when we got back, they dived onto the tablet, soon they were chattering away developing something on 'Minecraft'. There is nothing evil about technology. It is the balance of the way we fit it into our lives that matters.

Spent quite a bit of time on the beach this year. The phone was there for emergencies so it wasn't used. Yet there were people sitting there on the sand, gawping at their phones for ages - And they had kids!!! That's not balance. What on earth can be a more delightful way of spending time on a beach with your kids than building sand castles and playing beach cricket?
 
Like Birdys, I was more mature (34) when my first came along. I regret working all hours when the kids were really small but was able to adapt later.

Our thing was English Heritage, being North Yorkshire. Some of the events they put brought history to life for the kids and would lead to a day out by the seaside with fish and chips as a treat or a pub stop if doing the dales.

The nice thing now is that the kids will drag be down the pub with them from time to time. It might be because I end up paying but I like to think it is down to spending time together during formative years.
 
No its because you're paying Rex :17:

I never see mine unless he wants something. I'm expecting a call what with the imminent release of the next iphone :59:
 
AMac - 27/8/2014 18:10

No its because you're paying Rex :17:

I never see mine unless he wants something. I'm expecting a call what with the imminent release of the next iphone :59:
Click to expand...

I'm going out for a birthday meal with my folks tonight for that very reason.

Drinks that is, I already have a 32gb 5S.
 
"Mrs Bs sister & hubby have a 4 yo and it thoroughly depresses me the amount of time both parents spend on their phones (DOING WHAT!!) when out rather than engaging with their child. There's no wonder the poor little bugger clings to Mrs B like glue. its all v sad"

I've witnessed that first hand with in laws and close friends Mr B. Somehow or other I always end up talking to the children or playing football outside with them ? I just wonder what makes parents so singularly obsessed with almost everything else other than child rearing ?
 
AMac - 27/8/2014 18:16

"Mrs Bs sister & hubby have a 4 yo and it thoroughly depresses me the amount of time both parents spend on their phones (DOING WHAT!!) when out rather than engaging with their child. There's no wonder the poor little bugger clings to Mrs B like glue. its all v sad"

I've witnessed that first hand with in laws and close friends Mr B. Somehow or other I always end up talking to the children or playing football outside with them ? I just wonder what makes parents so singularly obsessed with almost everything else other than child rearing ?
Click to expand...

Same with my ex. I've been digging through the courts to see my son for over 2 years now. I get canny access despite her breaking the court orders left, right and centre.

Thing is, although she's a good mum she's always on the phone etc playing games or chatting up lads on tinder since her fiancé fucked off. Surely the bairn spending time with me at the park or the beach or whatever is better than letting him full his boots whilst she whinges about me on Facebook?!
 
Its a 'funny' world OM and it is only the last couple of years that the plight of separated Dads has come to my attention.
keep at it Buddy you will both be better for the contact I'm sure. Sad when the courts see otherwise.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.