Happy Independence Day
- Thread starter col8
- Start date
Melon Donkey
I am a little bit perplexed
Bollox to that.
It's melon pooch's first birthday .
Somehow we made it through the first year.
It's melon pooch's first birthday .
Somehow we made it through the first year.
V
Villan Of The North
Guest
I shall leave a copy of my Facebook post to my American freinds here:-
To all my American friends, following your treacherous declaration of 1776 and the subsequent successful sea blockade by our old enemy, the French, we have been forced to acknowledge your independence and subsequent economic growth, however, just like any other precocious unruly child, you have proved that you just can't be trusted yet, making friends with the neighbourhoods naughtiest children, in particular that snot nosed Korean kid. As a result, you will be pleased to know that, following the impending English FIFA world cup victory, we are prepared to welcome you back into the fold with just a few conditions, as follows:-
1. You will reinstate the letter "u" into words like "colour" and "flavour" (note the correct English spelling used here)
2. You will cease to ignore the second "i" when pronouncing the word "aluminium"
3. When referring to the game currently being exemplified by the dominant England team in Russia, you will use the traditional word, "football". Any other games currently described as such should be consigned to the history books, or if you really insist on continuing with such frivolous activity you should choose a more appropriate name, "Throw-ball" perhaps.
4. Your president will hand over power to Her Majesty's appointed governor, current favourites (note the use of the letter "u") for the post being Boris Johnson and Arnold Schwarzenegger, with your White House being renamed, "Her Majesty the Queen's American colonial residence", and your current House of Congress on Capitol hill will further more be known simply as "The governor’s residence"
5. Oprah and Dr Phil will immediately become peers of the realm and will be expected to relocate to England in order to take their rightful places in the House of Lords
6. Given her existing status within the Royal Family, Meghan Dutchess of Sussex will forthwith be known as Meghan Princess of America (after all, we have to give you something)
7. All America based (new) British subjects will learn the difference between "bring" and "take" and when to appropriately use them
8. See point number 7 regards the use of the words "me" and "I" in phrases such as "My wife and I" or "My wife and me"
9. Please note, "gotten" is not a word
10. On the same theme, the past participle of the word "drag" is "dragged", not "drug"
11. Finally, you will reinstate the traditional "s" that the reprobate Noah Webster replaced with "z" (which, incidentally is pronounced "zed" and not "zee", as you have erroneously thought for some time now) in words such as “patronise”
?
Happy 4th of July my friends!
Pride of Lions
I am now official
Happy Independence Day?........
I keep looking outta the fucking window expecting to see a huge bloody alien spaceship!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I keep looking outta the fucking window expecting to see a huge bloody alien spaceship!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
mike_field
Vital Football Legend
Is it too soon to mention slavery?
Andy The Ray
Vital Reserves Team
Im an expat, born in Guernsey, lived in Streetly, served in the army but feel more at home in US than UK. Can we leave out the anti American bollocks. I know most of you are doing it for a laugh but it grips my shit. Rant over
Andy The Ray
Vital Reserves Team
Bollox to that.
It's melon pooch's first birthday .
Somehow we made it through the first year.
I expected better than that from you MD. I was born and bred in UK, served in the Royal Engineers but feel more welcome here than in my own country. Im a Brit, always will be a Brit, but as soon as i get a chance i will apply for citizenship. There should be something wrong with this picture but its stupid things like what you said which has made up my opinion. I agree with 99% of your post's but this isn't one. Between me and the US they've given me a better lifestyle and chances that i could never have in UK
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Melon Donkey
I am a little bit perplexed
Oh I get it 4th of July doubles up as April fools ?.
Must be because what you have put there is a joke Andy.
Do I really need to explain that my post was total tongue in cheek about my dogs birthday!?.
If that's offensive then we may aswell give up and go home.
Blimey what a start to the day .
V
Villan Of The North
Guest
This seems like the right time for this:-
mike_field
Vital Football Legend
My post was anti pro slave owners and those who hid under the guise of the price of tea bags?
V
Villan Of The North
Guest
Perhaps he meant my "really serious" post? Intentions do get lost/confused over the internet.
kefkat
Vital Football Legend
I love The U.S.A! well there are two things I don't like there, one is the ex (though I am happy for you to keep him) and the other is the president, however I think the majority will agree with that. No where is perfect. I don't get the anti-U.S bile and never have from many
