The last REALLY Interesting Thread under Lambert | Page 95 | Vital Football

The last REALLY Interesting Thread under Lambert

See you later mate, hope you don't mind me adding myself and imaginary girlfriend to the table! :3:
 
Cheshire Villan - 20/6/2014 08:39

Back from the ExCel. Feet hurt, back hurts after 3 days on my feet talking to prospective punters. Don't talk to me about a bit of gardening. Real men go to trade shows.

Ermmmm, it's more of an extreme gardening..there's a gentle gradient, I had to tackle biting ants and the soil is clay-ey,...... so there.
 
Got home about an hour ago and heard a bird had got stuck down the chimney. Didn't have any tools here, no neighbours in to get a lump hammer and bolster chisel to get it out, but as it happens it's only plaster board at the top of the fireplace. Hacked away with a bread knife and can see a magpie. Hole big enough to escape (left window open), but it might be scared, so have left it alone to see if it comes out by itself. Been about 20 minutes so will go check. Don't want to manually get it out cos the freak me out getting too close :-(
 
Why don`t you hire Clive.
He can stand at the bottom of the chimney and chunter away in his block countray occent like and frighten the shit out of the poor bird and it`ll be sure to fly away.
He`ll be quite "cheap cheap" aswell I would have thought !
 
Magpie found its way out of the chimney brest, flapped around a bit, banged into a couple of walls, slipped all over the windowsill and poo-ed before finding the open window and flying away.
Step daughter said it the came back with another magpie, flew really low over the house and garden a couple of times as if to acknowledge us in some way. Good deed of the day done, repair smaller than first anticipated, mess kept to a minimum.
Might just have a beer tonight, and 'bother' the mrs at bedtime :17:
 
I'm going to shave... rock n roll

Actually,if I put my Motorhead tshirt on, I guess it would be rock n roll!

Morning Vital Villans :18:
 
Don't do what i did a few years back up Durham when collecting my passport, my mate drove me up there been on the beers up there walked into the office and when asked if i had any dangerous weapons etc on me i said like a dick head ''nah apart from these two grenades in me back pocket'' then i was swarmed by the security and she was threatening to throw me out and be arrested, i apologised ''I day mean it like'' i said and she said you are a very lucky boy now get out of my face,,,,and i did tbh