Man who had sex with these two dogs found with their DNA on his penis

mike_field

mike_field

Vital Football Legend
https://metro.co.uk/2018/05/24/man-sex-two-dogs-found-dna-penis-757

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Hey, any port in a storm Mike. Or make that 2 ports. Woof woof!

Disclaimer: This story is actually horrific, and I am appalled by it. Having just checked, that link is dead, and I am starting to think Mike has made this up in order to catch someone out. Looks like that someone was me. The shame.
 
Yes on a serious note, animals??

If you're that desperate just warm up a couple of chicken breasts, put them in a jar, and go to town on it.

Yes, that's an actual thing, thanks internet.
 
Piss taking aside (and knew you'd take it the right way :thumbup:)

WTF

People have hands, there are dildos, flashlights and probably a host of things I'm not aware of. You say chicken, I've seen reference to drilling out a melon and things like that (like you I blame the internet and weird things I watch on TV!), so why choose something that could literally bite it off?

Some on this planet should not be allowed to share the same air!
 
Yep, it beggars belief.

As the great philosopher Bill Hicks once said "just jerk off and go about your day".

I'm off to count the sheep and catch some sleep. But I'm only counting them, not shagging them. Because as fucked up as I am on many levels, I ain't that fucked up.
 
Ahhh Hicks....If I'd have decided to come into my parents life earlier I could've appreciated him more!

The good ones really are taken early - although to be fair he kind of had a say in that lol

Same here dude, enjoy your sheep but I again find your qualification worrying as it scares me more about your state of mind when it comes to justification!

Sleep tight, wake bright...and stay away from cats!!!!!!
 
Dog 1 must be devastated. Oh, I'll bet he was a sweet talker, saying all the right words and as soon as she turns her back, he's shagging another bitch.
 
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