How to Recognise Different Types of Trees From Quite a Long Way Away
- Thread starter Juan Mourep
- Start date
Pride of Lions
I am now official
DeanoVilla
One Bloody Number
This reminds me of one of my favourite ever jokes... (you have to read it in a Mexican accent for the full effect)
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving.
They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says……… “Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk.”
“Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. ”
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon. There’s raw bacon, there’s fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon …. Every imaginable kind of cured pork.
“Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree.”
“Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don’t forget.”
“Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon…ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree.” And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree.
He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath, “Pepe… Go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree! Ees not a bacon tree! Ees Ees a ham bush….”
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving.
They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says……… “Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk.”
“Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. ”
With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon. There’s raw bacon, there’s fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon …. Every imaginable kind of cured pork.
“Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree.”
“Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don’t forget.”
“Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon…ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree.” And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree.
He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath, “Pepe… Go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree! Ees not a bacon tree! Ees Ees a ham bush….”
G
Guest
Guest
I want to be a tree
V
Villan Of The North
Guest
Well you're already a plank Clive, is that not close enough for you? :17:
:86:
G
Guest
Guest
:1: :19: :19: That was a good en mar mate i will give you that ya bugger :19: 8/10
G
Guest
Guest
Now i have tried to work this puzzle out :19: how the feck you do this then :69: :169: i know how to tell the back of a woman to the front though one side has big ballons on and the other a sideways smile :139:
mike_field
Vital Football Legend
What about if they're small?
