How Happy Are You? | Vital Football

How Happy Are You?

BodyButter

Vital Football Legend
Just out of curiosity, how happy are out of ten? I mean generally, not just right now. If 0 is suicidal and 10 is deliriously happy, how happy are you?
 
Happiness is peace and contentment I have learnt truly! I suppose I can say about an 8. I am happy with my lot.

It will never be a 10 as Mr K.K is no longer physically here. I have had to forge a relationship with him through grief (which is love) and spirituality.

Happiness is not material or monetary as most perceive. Those things are temporal.

I have peace of mind today. I have contentment today. These are not based on worldly things. They are based on knowing who I am (which i never did cos of my life story) and having a relationship with myself.

When anyone puts there happiness in others, people, places, things or situations, they are not real and cannot last.

An 8 might sound bizarre going on what I have just said too, about not putting your happiness in others however grief is very different and is incorporated with this score as a balance, if you follow
 
5

I don't really have a reference point, I don't really know what happy is supposed to feel like, it's all relative. But at the same time, despite having bouts of depression I've never even come close to considering offing myself. Might as well ride the spiral til the end. There is a light that never goes out. (two musical references there, I think music saves)

I do tend to have a sense of humour about everything which I think helps, otherwise I'd have no friends!
 
All joking aside, interesting thread @BodyButter.

If I'm being totally honest, I'd have to say 3, maybe 4. I am fortunate - I have a job, I live in a nice enough house, I have a wife and children who are amazing.

But something is missing, big style. My exact circumstances are nowhere near where I imagined myself to be 25 years ago. I recognise how lucky I am in many respects, but there is still a huge nagging feeling that I need/want/deserve something more.
 
All joking aside, interesting thread @BodyButter.

If I'm being totally honest, I'd have to say 3, maybe 4. I am fortunate - I have a job, I live in a nice enough house, I have a wife and children who are amazing.

But something is missing, big style. My exact circumstances are nowhere near where I imagined myself to be 25 years ago. I recognise how lucky I am in many respects, but there is still a huge nagging feeling that I need/want/deserve something more.

Interesting JPA, I thought I was being a miserable git giving it a 5! lol

I don't there's anything wrong with that nagging feeling, I get that too, I suppose it's something to figure out and ultimately something to keep you going rather than going stale, if that makes any sense.
 
Finding this really difficult. Before Kuala Lumpur, and with all the problems, I was just in a total storm in life, pretty much always. But I have a sense of humour and a strange disposition to look on the bright side.

At times, I guess, around the time of being ignored about my brain condition, after the op, etc etc etc, I don't think I could say there was any happiness, just survival. So that would be a 0.

Finding good friends (a lot via this site) establishing a business, coming to terms with the operations and health, plus a strong mental attitude and spirit, I guess that would go to about a 5.

But KL brought me peace. Straight after, I'd have given it a 10, honestly, I was walking on air, there was an ecstasy about how I felt. Being that 'high' I guess couldn't last and two operations and some flair ups followed, but even through those I have a peace and acceptance.

Now? Love my mates, am enjoying trying to make the book a success, looking to potentially semi retire from the main part of the business (not from this site), enjoy my mates little kids and my nephew and niece are special people, so they all, always put a smile on my face and so on...

Start of the year was fairly brutal health wise, probably at 5-6 during that, just because the fatigue can be crushing, and being content and/or at peace isn't the same as the question, how happy.

At the moment, despite a few tensions, I think I'd say 7 and I'm working on getting that to 8 !

You do have to work at happiness, find what brings you joys and more importantly identify what brings you down (and even more importantly, doing something about it).
 
All joking aside, interesting thread @BodyButter.

If I'm being totally honest, I'd have to say 3, maybe 4. I am fortunate - I have a job, I live in a nice enough house, I have a wife and children who are amazing.

But something is missing, big style. My exact circumstances are nowhere near where I imagined myself to be 25 years ago. I recognise how lucky I am in many respects, but there is still a huge nagging feeling that I need/want/deserve something more.

I expect it is the inner longing as to what life is all about! The point, the struggle, the inner life.

NOT religious JPA. I mean an inner longing. The 2nd stage of life as they call it.

From order, to disorder to reorder. 1st = Eek= 2nd

Been listening to alot of spiritual non dual, Buddhist and philosophy the past year since david passed.

I think we all reach a stage in life where we need to explore more than just the synthetic level of living. The mask to the world that is forever changing
 
All joking aside, interesting thread @BodyButter.

If I'm being totally honest, I'd have to say 3, maybe 4. I am fortunate - I have a job, I live in a nice enough house, I have a wife and children who are amazing.

But something is missing, big style. My exact circumstances are nowhere near where I imagined myself to be 25 years ago. I recognise how lucky I am in many respects, but there is still a huge nagging feeling that I need/want/deserve something more.

What would you have imagined life to be like at your age 25 years ago?
 
If you’ve studied anything business related at school, college or uni you’ve probably come across Maslow's Hierachy of needs. The question is, as someone else put, all relative. I have never had a serious medical condition - in fact I’ve always been in very good health apart from the odd accident. The point in relation to the theory above is that we all take the level we’re at and are aiming for the next level, without realising there are also levels below.

I watched a programme about homeless people and the common theme was that like a bus, problems come in twos or threes and your life has changed in a matter of weeks or months. So having a good job driving a nice motor, nice property and kids still in touch you might rate it a low score but that’s relative to the position you’re in.
 
Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs looks at things from a very economic perspective. I'm sure we've all experienced ups and downs in our lives and while being broke will make you unhappy, being rich doesn't necessarily make you happy. Material things can give you a temporary bump but then they become normal very quickly. Placing happiness and value in material things is misguided.
 
I'd say around a 8 at the moment.

The end of 2018 through til now has been a really challenging year. I started my new job after graduating from my Post-Grad leadership course in September of 2018. I went on holiday to Mexico and when I came back me and my partner split up, and it got a bit messy. I didn't really see it coming so it hit me pretty hard. I wasn't in a good place for a few months after this- I'd put everything into this relationship so to have it snatched away from me was difficult. Just felt like I'd wasted my time and money and then as time went on I felt absolutely gutted at how much I'd given up for him. For that period I'd stopped going to the Villa away games because for some weird reason I felt I shouldn't go just to please him. Even for the home games, I used to race back home as quick as I could after because I felt guilty off to The Villa. I'd never ever do that again. I was coping ok at work, it was a big distraction which probably helped. But when I came home I was doing nothing, sitting around and couldn't find the motivation to do anything or go out, which is just not me.

This carried on for a while, even over the Christmas and New Year period and I'd say it wasn't until February I got myself out of the rut I was in. I was offered a ticket last minute at Stoke away in February, and not only did that game turn Villa's season around, I think it turned me around. I re-discovered why I loved following the Villa and made me question why did I ever give this up? So from that point, I went to all the away games remaining last season and really enjoyed it again. Then, over on Twitter I found a load of new friends, through The Villa. Some real good people who helped me a lot. All of a sudden I found this new circle of friends which really was brilliant.

Now- I feel really good. I have this big network of people around me, going through some hard times with health in my close family, especially with my eldest brother, but apart from that, everything is good. As relationships go... I don't feel I've had much luck with it, and I'm giving myself a rest. I have a massive barrier up at the moment and its purely because I don't want to get hurt again. So at the moment, I'm just enjoying life, not taking anything too seriously and going out with my mates every weekend alongside the Villa. Bliss!