Here's a daft question that came up | Vital Football

Here's a daft question that came up

jokerman

jokerman

Vital Football Hero
in a zoom discussion of old friends.

How many of us have slept/shared a bed with their father/mother, sister/brother beyond being very young?

It was sparked by the old Morecambe and Wise sketches with them in bed together.

My father shared a bed with his brother all through growing up.

On occasions, I did likewise with my father -usually visiting my grandparents.

Once, I was told to share a bed with a young aunt when my parents, my aunt, and, truth be told, even I were not aware of how aware I had become. I still remember the nylon nightie....but that's enough of that.

And just to dampen the prurient interest, how many of us have slept with a piss pot under the bed, a shared piss pot, and a shared piss pot with fag ends floating around in it by morning? And how many of us have been the designated emptier?

Let's take all the incest, seduction and Swindon jokes as read. However, the thread is open to piss pot jokes.
 
Blimey, i had to read this twice, first time I thought I must have smoked one of Buddha's fags and had a really strange dream 😳
Jumbling all the words up , the only memory I have anything like that is having an aunt that smelled of piss (I never slept with her though).
Does that count?
 
Due to separate medical conditions (mine is a chronic back condition and my missus has restless leg syndrome and insomnia) I sleep on an orthopedic single bed at the other end of the house from my other half.

As we only have one bathroom and I don't like to disturb her in the night, I use a pisspot and can recommend the larger size upright Bold Washing Liquid bottle. Has a screw top (so not disaster if knocked over) and is just the right size for me. May not be for any "big boys" out there.

I also keep one in the back of the car in case I get caught short with no public lavs about. That's age for you.
 
jokerman said:
in a zoom discussion of old friends.

How many of us have slept/shared a bed with their father/mother, sister/brother beyond being very young?

It was sparked by the old Morecambe and Wise sketches with them in bed together.

My father shared a bed with his brother all through growing up.

On occasions, I did likewise with my father -usually visiting my grandparents.

Once, I was told to share a bed with a young aunt when my parents, my aunt, and, truth be told, even I were not aware of how aware I had become. I still remember the nylon nightie....but that's enough of that.

And just to dampen the prurient interest, how many of us have slept with a piss pot under the bed, a shared piss pot, and a shared piss pot with fag ends floating around in it by morning? And how many of us have been the designated emptier?

Let's take all the incest, seduction and Swindon jokes as read. However, the thread is open to piss pot jokes.
Click to expand...

I've shared a bed with my Dad on a few occasions. I prefer not to though because he snores and farts!

And obviously I have a piss pot! Especially in the winter, you think I'm going outside in the freezing cold to have a piss in the middle of the night??!!

Ten points to the first person to explain where the phrases, "piss poor", and "not even got a pot to piss in", originated?
 
jokerman said:
in a zoom discussion of old friends.

How many of us have slept/shared a bed with their father/mother, sister/brother beyond being very young?

It was sparked by the old Morecambe and Wise sketches with them in bed together.

My father shared a bed with his brother all through growing up.

On occasions, I did likewise with my father -usually visiting my grandparents.

Once, I was told to share a bed with a young aunt when my parents, my aunt, and, truth be told, even I were not aware of how aware I had become. I still remember the nylon nightie....but that's enough of that.

And just to dampen the prurient interest, how many of us have slept with a piss pot under the bed, a shared piss pot, and a shared piss pot with fag ends floating around in it by morning? And how many of us have been the designated emptier?

Let's take all the incest, seduction and Swindon jokes as read. However, the thread is open to piss pot jokes.
Click to expand...

All of the above was the norm when I was born.
 
jokerman said:
in a zoom discussion of old friends.

How many of us have slept/shared a bed with their father/mother, sister/brother beyond being very young?

It was sparked by the old Morecambe and Wise sketches with them in bed together.

My father shared a bed with his brother all through growing up.

On occasions, I did likewise with my father -usually visiting my grandparents.

Once, I was told to share a bed with a young aunt when my parents, my aunt, and, truth be told, even I were not aware of how aware I had become. I still remember the nylon nightie....but that's enough of that.

And just to dampen the prurient interest, how many of us have slept with a piss pot under the bed, a shared piss pot, and a shared piss pot with fag ends floating around in it by morning? And how many of us have been the designated emptier?

Let's take all the incest, seduction and Swindon jokes as read. However, the thread is open to piss pot jokes.
Click to expand...
That's all made me feel rather ill.

My dad had to share a bed with his brother until the age of 31 when he got married.
 
Gills 58 said:
That's all made me feel rather ill.

My dad had to share a bed with his brother until the age of 31 when he got married.
Click to expand...

It all made you feel ill?!

The only bit I found nauseating was the bit about the adolescent jokerman getting the horn for his nylon nightie clad young aunt. Could have done without that bit!

Did you ever tell her, jokerman? Not at the time, I mean later in life!
 
Wayne.Kerr said:
Tanning because my maternal grandfather used to collect dog shite for the tannery and I never believed him
Click to expand...

lol Wayne. The ten points are yours!

Yes, indeed it was tanning. If you were 'piss poor' it meant you were so poor you had to sell your piss to the tannery. Not having 'a pot to piss in' meant you were yet poorer still, so poor that you couldn't even sell your piss to the tannery.
 
Buddha said:
lol Wayne. The ten points are yours!

Yes, indeed it was tanning. If you were 'piss poor' it meant you were so poor you had to sell your piss to the tannery. Not having 'a pot to piss in' meant you were yet poorer still, so poor that you couldn't even sell your piss to the tannery.
Click to expand...
My grandfather mentioned it when I walked into his house one day and I was sucking the end of my school satchel shoulder strap. Never again and my grandma pee'd herself laughing but not in a pot. They had money.
 
Wayne.Kerr said:
My grandfather mentioned it when I walked into his house one day and I was sucking the end of my school satchel shoulder strap. Never again and my grandma pee'd herself laughing but not in a pot. They had money.
Click to expand...

lol, again!

Did you stop sucking your satchel strap after that?!
 
I shared a double bed with my mum in 2005 for 4 nights in Paris! I booked a room with 2 singles and we were given a double by error! I was 41 and Mum was 63!
 
Topping and tailing with aunts and cousins was part of family Christmas's until I was about 14. How else can about 20 people stay overnight in a modest terraced house?
 
We used to go on holiday to Jaywick Sands back in the sixties and the house on the beach had an outdoor privy. So we had to use the gazunder at night.
 
We didn’t have to share beds but we always shared the room, right up until I left home.
That was normal in those days.

Funnily enough, I was chatting with my youngest last week about similar and told him I never had my own room and he said he couldn’t remember not having an en-suite.
I said I could remember not having a tv and he said that he couldn’t remember not having Sky.

Oh how times have changed in a single generation.

Kids today ............
 
jokerman said:
in a zoom discussion of old friends.

How many of us have slept/shared a bed with their father/mother, sister/brother beyond being very young?

It was sparked by the old Morecambe and Wise sketches with them in bed together.

My father shared a bed with his brother all through growing up.

On occasions, I did likewise with my father -usually visiting my grandparents.

Once, I was told to share a bed with a young aunt when my parents, my aunt, and, truth be told, even I were not aware of how aware I had become. I still remember the nylon nightie....but that's enough of that.

And just to dampen the prurient interest, how many of us have slept with a piss pot under the bed, a shared piss pot, and a shared piss pot with fag ends floating around in it by morning? And how many of us have been the designated emptier?

Let's take all the incest, seduction and Swindon jokes as read. However, the thread is open to piss pot jokes.
Click to expand...


Great diversionary thread, Jokerman - it`s why I insist on calling you the Guv`nor.

Just one thing, though. How long did it take you to grow out of wearing the nylon nightie ?
 
Six of us used to sleep in a bed when we were kids. Me, my sister, my half brother, my half sister and her half brother and half sister... No, we are not from Swindon lol
 
mozzer59 said:
I shared a double bed with my mum in 2005 for 4 nights in Paris! I booked a room with 2 singles and we were given a double by error! I was 41 and Mum was 63!
Click to expand...

That is pretty damn good. Four nights in Paris is like a year in any other place! Especially when....
 
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