Gay Footballer - 'I had to leave football' | Vital Football

Gay Footballer - 'I had to leave football'

BodyButter

Vital Football Legend
Former Leeds and USA footballer, Robbie Rogers, has said that it would have been impossible for him to come out if he was still playing.

He was released by Leeds in January and then came out in February.

It seems to me that football has run its course for Rogers and that he just didn't cut the mustard. Now he's come out and is saying that he's stepping away from football because you can't be gay and a footballer.

Perhaps I just don't understand the struggles of the gay man but I just can't see what the big deal is.

If Benteke came out, would you care?

If Stephen Ireland came out, would it lower your opinion of him?
 
Funnily enough was discussing this yesterday.

If "football" is ever to get over this seeming "taboo" then it needs a player to stand up and be counted for in the same way that black players have been able to break the mould.

No problem with it at all, as long as there isn't a call for gay managers to get more opportunities at a higher level simply because of sexuality (here's looking at you non-white football managers whinging!)

As intimated above, this is a player who's football career wasn't really going that far anyway. I hadn't heard of the bloke until the story broke he was a gay footballer!

It seems a fairly big story at the moment in US Sports, as there's supposedly an NFL player set to "come out."
 
Trekker - 30/3/2013 09:09

I don't think black players had a lot of choice really.
Seeing as how they are black.

Would you not agree though that sexuality isn't a question of "choice" either?
 
All well & good saying it needs someone to make a stand. That happened all those years ago and because of the abuse and ridicule he suffered, Fashanu killed himself. What's the point in making this stand? For a footballer to do it there would be limited benefit. Yes they would probably help change attitude so it's easier in the future for people to do it but let's face it, this is one area in which football has not moved on. The player who makes this stand would face ridicule all the time. From his team mates, his manager, supporters, opposition players etc. No one deserves to be subject to that and so that's why no one will make the stand.

Think the story about Robbie Rogers is sad. He absolutely loves football, you can see that and I think it's a terrible shame he feels he needs to move away from football to be happy and at ease with his own life. That is a crying shame for football in general but I understand where he is coming from totally. Everyone saying things will change and improve but it won't, I'm adamant it won't. Football has been the same for years and years and won't be any different.
 
I think Justin fashanau killed himself because he was on the run from police after raping a schoolboy, not because people were taking the piss out of him for being gay. His suicide was many years after his football career had finished.

If there is a problem, then it's within the dressing room and pfa. I honestly don't think it would be that big a deal to supporters, the media or anyone else.
 
Football is one area that has not moved on? = Its a male dominated sport where masculinity is a key ingredient. I dont think many of them will appreciate being ogled by a queenie.

If a man ogles a female and she slaps his face, or gives him a dirty look, then it could be deemed an acceptable response.

So what does a gay man do in the situation of being surrounded by guys he sexually attracted to? If he lets on he is gay, he may well have live the rest of his life in that sport looking down at the floor, thus in fear that he might look at a fellow man in the wrong way. Or he can just keep quiet about his sexuality. I mean if a gay man is naturally sexually attracted to men in a male sport = how can he NOT look at any fellow man without feeling a desire of sexual attraction? Its the same with a heterosexual man(imagine the man to be gross and unattractive to the female population) in a female hockey team, im sure he would love sharing the showers after the game. But the females would be reluctant to have him in their team or in their showers, changing rooms. But if it was a gross and unattractive female they would be less bothered.
 
It's a good point actually GT. if I was able go in the showers with a load of fit young women everyday, the last thing I'd do is say anything to possibly stop that!
 
James06 - 30/3/2013 10:05

For what it's worth, as a counterbalance, in the women's game I reckon 90% are gay.

At one of my old hockey clubs, the high school/college players would never stay after the matches. They were genuinely worried about the whole changing room ethos.

Bad times.

On subject however, surely life has moved on no?
 
Green Tea - 30/3/2013 10:36

Football is one area that has not moved on? = Its a male dominated sport where masculinity is a key ingredient. I dont think many of them will appreciate being ogled by a queenie.

If a man ogles a female and she slaps his face, or gives him a dirty look, then it could be deemed an acceptable response.

So what does a gay man do in the situation of being surrounded by guys he sexually attracted to? If he lets on he is gay, he may well have live the rest of his life in that sport looking down at the floor, thus in fear that he might look at a fellow man in the wrong way. Or he can just keep quiet about his sexuality. I mean if a gay man is naturally sexually attracted to men in a male sport = how can he NOT look at any fellow man without feeling a desire of sexual attraction? Its the same with a heterosexual man(imagine the man to be gross and unattractive to the female population) in a female hockey team, im sure he would love sharing the showers after the game. But the females would be reluctant to have him in their team or in their showers, changing rooms. But if it was a gross and unattractive female they would be less bothered.

Few issues with what you say:

1. You make out that all gay men fancy every bloke on the planet. Surprisingly it works the same way as straight people...attracted to certain people.

2. Footballers you play with would be your friends. There's certain boundaries between friends. How often do you find yourself attracted to your friends? That doesn't happen very often at all.

3. " Queenies" don't ogle on their friends. If you know their straight, then FFS as if you would go for that.

You make all homosexuals sound like animals who can't control themselves. You don't find it sad that a guy who loves football has had to give it up because he wants to be happy in his own life?

I agree with parts of what you say about the showers etc, but it's not as straight forward as you point out. I went on holiday with a group of lads... My friends... I didn't ogle at them as you say. And I'm sure they didn't feel uncomfortable with me. I get your opinion and that's fine that's your opinion but I just find it incredibly sad when someone has to give something up they love just to find happiness in life. Everyone deserves happiness and they deserve it without having to give up their livelihood just because of their sexuality.



 
I think some of the responses answer your question perfectly bodybutter. Some men seem massively insecure about their sexuality and too immature to understand some are different.

You can't be different in this world, you must be magnolia and fit in with the stereotypes, did no one send you the memo?

And obviously crowd/mob mentality would lead to the chants, some would think it banter. I guess some gays would think it was as well, others wouldn't.

So the answer really I guess is yes, it does matter, purely because of the ignorance in society. Easier to not let on.

Seen the same sort of interviews from gay lads in boy bands who have to keep it a secret.

Funny old game!
 
James06 - 30/3/2013 10:05

For what it's worth, as a counterbalance, in the women's game I reckon 90% are gay.

No Jim, just 90% turned down your advances before you hooked up and got married! LOL

:10: :21:
 
I don't think the shower question is a problem.
It's a red herring.
Yes of course there will be lots of name calling and some discusting attitude but some people like Maradonna deserve it for all time.
I detest people being persecuted for their sexuality

But I will still make jokes about it.