Civility, where has it gone? | Vital Football

Civility, where has it gone?

Wurzel

Wurzel

Vital Football Legend
I can get over what mean spirited times we are living in. I'm not sure if it is the anonymity that makes people think they can be as rude and insulting as possible on social media, but it is a really sad place society finds itself in. I know Twitter is a shit hole of vileness, I expect that, but I have just been reading my local towns forum and the sheer rudeness and ignorance of the posters in really shocking. And these aren't kids, these are senior citizens who are supposedly the pillars of society. What the hell is wrong with these people? Why are they so sure that their opinion is so right and everybody elses is so wrong. How did we get to a place where people with differing thoughts cannot agree to disagree and move on without insults.

We need to understand that having a different opinion is not a crime, does not make you a tw*t, or qualify you to have the shit kicked out of you.

As Lenny Kravitz once sang We have to let love rule!
 
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For 80% of people I'd say its the distance technology allows us to have but the other 20% would do the same thing when the chips are down. Certain topics complicate things of course. You can have the opinion the Earth is flat and you willbe absolutely derided for it, and rightly so.
 
Yeah I agree, we have lost a lot of respect for other peoples opinion and live in a country/world where keyboard warriors have the ability to text/tweet vile abuse because they think they are safe.
 
They have always been with us, the cowards, that wont say something to your face, but previously never had the platform on which to vent their bile.
Some of the social media platforms are best avoided unless you have a strong stomach, or a couldnt care less attitude.
 
It's becoming endemic now though. I was reading a music journalist's blog which I really like. He then made a comment basically saying that if you voted the opposite way to him you should be ashamed of yourself? WOW. Voting in a democratic election and I should be ashamed of myself? Who died and made him the judge of what is correct in the world? Is he an expert in politics? No. If he was telling me something about the NWOBHM I might listen to it, but politics? I very much doubt he has anymore clue than me about what is going on.
We need to stop this judgmental bollocks, or we are going to end up divided like the US and how is that working out for them. People have different ideas, sometimes crazy, but it does not give anybody the right to be aggressive or demeaning. If you wouldn't talk to your mother that way then don't talk to anybody else that way seems a sensible rule.

NB. I just wanted to point out that I am not writing this because it has happened to me, just that I was reading a forum of supposedly olders and betters and their behavior was atrocious and definitely wouldn't be tolerated on here.
 
Wurzel said:
It's becoming endemic now though. I was reading a music journalist's blog which I really like. He then made a comment basically saying that if you voted the opposite way to him you should be ashamed of yourself? WOW. Voting in a democratic election and I should be ashamed of myself? Who died and made him the judge of what is correct in the world? Is he an expert in politics? No. If he was telling me something about the NWOBHM I might listen to it, but politics? I very much doubt he has anymore clue than me about what is going on.
We need to stop this judgmental bollocks, or we are going to end up divided like the US and how is that working out for them. People have different ideas, sometimes crazy, but it does not give anybody the right to be aggressive or demeaning. If you wouldn't talk to your mother that way then don't talk to anybody else that way seems a sensible rule.

NB. I just wanted to point out that I am not writing this because it has happened to me, just that I was reading a forum of supposedly olders and betters and their behavior was atrocious and definitely wouldn't be tolerated on here.
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Older, yes, better no.
Age doesnt make the ill mannered any less rude, it just emboldens them.
 
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wittonite said:
Older, yes, better no.
Age doesnt make the ill mannered any less rude, it just emboldens them.
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I'm getting to that age now where I say what i think, then again I think I've been there for many years.
In saying that I'm very polite, I hold doors open for anyone one, I say thank you and please, excuse me, and am one of those nice people. It works better like that.
I just don't suffer fools
 
Wurzel said:
It's becoming endemic now though.
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It is, and also the bile from the internet I think now has fed into an upturn in the 'real world'.

I have noticed a dramatic change in interactions in the 20 years I've been involved with forums and also the language you get from some if you have to remove a post and/or moderate.

I was reading a music journalist's blog which I really like. He then made a comment basically saying that if you voted the opposite way to him you should be ashamed of yourself? WOW.

Voting in a democratic election and I should be ashamed of myself? Who died and made him the judge of what is correct in the world? Is he an expert in politics? No. If he was telling me something about the NWOBHM I might listen to it, but politics? I very much doubt he has anymore clue than me about what is going on.
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Yes, they have a voice and now an audience, so then feel legitimised to in some way so that their opinion is more important than anyone elses.

I have decent numbers on social media for Vital Villa and this year, with a flair up, then the lockdown, I have put it all at arms length. You express and opinion that doesn't match others, and wow the response.

I am sure I put it on this site before, I once did a comment about the Brits, it wasn't slating the new acts so much as me saying I really don't know the new lot and don't get their sort of music (which actualy isn't an old man's opinion, I was saying there wasn't enough anger and energy in the modern stuff!)

I respect anyone making a living or doing well out of music, so it was pretty tame stuff and I do think I have a good knack of laughing at myself in things. But I got a few really angry responses and the best was 'If you don't know who Taylor Swift is (I didn't, I had to google, and to be fair, why would i?) you are a c*** and if you say you have never heard of Ryan Adams (I hadn't, only Bryan) you are a liar'. I laughed and said something back, he then said 'give me your postcode, I'll come round and it will be scene.' (I assume he thought he was a gangsa) ... I just asked if we were fighting or acting and left.

But over something that insignificant, I got that much anger back. Amazing stuff really.
 
Villan57 said:
I'm getting to that age now where I say what i think, then again I think I've been there for many years.
In saying that I'm very polite, I hold doors open for anyone one, I say thank you and please, excuse me, and am one of those nice people. It works better like that.
I just don't suffer fools
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So much nicer, to be nice isn't it? But have to say, I'm not suffering fools or people being arsey or rude these days. I used to put up with it on forums and on my facebook, now I just remove from my life.
 
Villan57 said:
I'm getting to that age now where I say what i think, then again I think I've been there for many years.
In saying that I'm very polite, I hold doors open for anyone one, I say thank you and please, excuse me, and am one of those nice people. It works better like that.
I just don't suffer fools
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Joking aside 57, nothing wrong with saying what you think, and I am sure you have never been economical with the truth anyway.
There is however no need to be rude to someone, but sadly some seem to delight in it.
Yes re the doors etc, its the way we were brought up, and its a good thing.
It does however really annoy when someone, usually older, and female, and smartly dressed swans through the afore mentioned door as if you are a fuckin servant.
Cant resist saying thank you as they pass through just to wind them up.
 
wittonite said:
Joking aside 57, nothing wrong with saying what you think, and I am sure you have never been economical with the truth anyway.
There is however no need to be rude to someone, but sadly some seem to delight in it.
Yes re the doors etc, its the way we were brought up, and its a good thing.
It does however really annoy when someone, usually older, and female, and smartly dressed swans through the afore mentioned door as if you are a fuckin servant.
Cant resist saying thank you as they pass through just to wind them up.
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I used to go and get a Sunday paper and being Sunday the West Indian community dress up for Church. I held the paper shop door open for this little old man in his Sunday best, he tipped his hat and said thank you, sir, I said you're welcome. I then thought where did it all go from that to gangs of vile foulmouth knife welding gangs of black youths.
 
Political discourse is pretty much dead. Too many people are too entrenched in their views, talk in soundbites and are consumed with confirmation bias. Too many people are simply looking for 'gotcha moments' in an attempt to 'expose' those who disagree with them.
 
Wurzel said:
It's becoming endemic now though. I was reading a music journalist's blog which I really like. He then made a comment basically saying that if you voted the opposite way to him you should be ashamed of yourself? WOW. Voting in a democratic election and I should be ashamed of myself? Who died and made him the judge of what is correct in the world? Is he an expert in politics? No. If he was telling me something about the NWOBHM I might listen to it, but politics? I very much doubt he has anymore clue than me about what is going on.
We need to stop this judgmental bollocks, or we are going to end up divided like the US and how is that working out for them. People have different ideas, sometimes crazy, but it does not give anybody the right to be aggressive or demeaning. If you wouldn't talk to your mother that way then don't talk to anybody else that way seems a sensible rule.

NB. I just wanted to point out that I am not writing this because it has happened to me, just that I was reading a forum of supposedly olders and betters and their behavior was atrocious and definitely wouldn't be tolerated on here.
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I aould say this country is as divided as The U.S. Its been like that and getting worse since the Brexit vote
 
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Brilliant thread Wurzel.

Very difficult these days to have a different opinion without being shamed, name called etc.
 
wittonite said:
They have always been with us, the cowards, that wont say something to your face, but previously never had the platform on which to vent their bile.
Some of the social media platforms are best avoided unless you have a strong stomach, or a couldnt care less attitude.
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VitalVilla is nearest thing to a social media site that I go on. Have never been on twitter and just dont get it. Tried facebook and lasted less than a week. Dont know anything about any of the others.
 
astonion2 said:
VitalVilla is nearest thing to a social media site that I go on. Have never been on twitter and just dont get it. Tried facebook and lasted less than a week. Dont know anything about any of the others.
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Ha ha mate, you did better than me.
I lasted on face book one day, signed in the next time and a load of women I never heard of wanted to be friends.
Wife wouldnt be happy with that.
 
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