Best blags... | Vital Football

Best blags...

NottyImp

Vital Football Legend
#1
... following on from plumbob's Tunisian colleague, what are your best blags?

I'm not really a blagger, but Mrs N. just managed to get a free replacement wheelie-bin out of the council. 😁
 

cheshireimp

Vital 1st Team Regular
#4
Saturday Morning Cinema back in the 60s . 6 pence or 9 pence to get in (pre decimal) Better seats being 9 pence

Always bought 6 pence then turned the tickets upside down . Where else were it going to go with your bird but the back row. Not exactly the crime of the century, at least it was dark ..............
 

Rob the Imp

Vital Football Hero
#6
A former roommate of mine, a fairly hefty chap, used to wear a long black coat when going for nights out in Sheffield where we lived at the time, and would stand outside the well-known rock nightclub there and pretend to be a bouncer, asking for ID and turning people away randomly...just because he could. He was a bit of a dick, really...
 

clanfordimp

Vital Squad Member
#7
Once drove to Shrewsbury away with 3 mates to the new stadium. After stopping in the town centre for a few light refreshments we made our way out to the stadium. If you've ever been to Shrewsbury you will know how far the ground is out of the town centre, they even have to run coaches for their own fans out to it !!
Anyway on arriving in the vicinity of the ground there was no parking to be found anywhere. On impulse I drove straight into the carpark to be greeted by a steward and when I put my window down I just blurted out that we were Lincoln City Directors !!!! Luckily I had a fairly decent moter in the form of a Mercedes ML and to me and my mates utter disbelief the steward pointed us straight into the Directors carparking spaces.
You've never seen 4 blokes park up, get out a car and get into a stadium so quick in your life.
We managed to get away with though.
 

NottyImp

Vital Football Legend
#11
Ok, so I did once blag a free guitar amp.

For some reason, my guitar amp stopped working. I made an insurance claim stating I'd dropped it down the stairs.

My insurance company actually sent an assesor round to look at it.

I won the claim. Long before the days of excess.
 

NottyImp

Vital Football Legend
#13
And Mrs N. - expert blagger - has just reminded me she got the council to pick up our old sofa by doing a a fantastic impression of a poor little old disabled lady on the 'phone. Top stuff!
 

bristolimp

Vital Football Hero
#14
And Mrs N. - expert blagger - has just reminded me she got the council to pick up our old sofa by doing a a fantastic impression of a poor little old disabled lady on the 'phone. Top stuff!
we had a broken tv (massive great thing) as students in an area called erdington Birmingham we didn’t drive didn’t want to pay the fee so we left it on the wall of the house opposite. It lasted 30 seconds before someone liberated it - suckers
 

HoofGrantBrown

Vital Squad Member
#15
Once drove to Shrewsbury away with 3 mates to the new stadium. After stopping in the town centre for a few light refreshments we made our way out to the stadium. If you've ever been to Shrewsbury you will know how far the ground is out of the town centre, they even have to run coaches for their own fans out to it !!
Anyway on arriving in the vicinity of the ground there was no parking to be found anywhere. On impulse I drove straight into the carpark to be greeted by a steward and when I put my window down I just blurted out that we were Lincoln City Directors !!!! Luckily I had a fairly decent moter in the form of a Mercedes ML and to me and my mates utter disbelief the steward pointed us straight into the Directors carparking spaces.
You've never seen 4 blokes park up, get out a car and get into a stadium so quick in your life.
We managed to get away with though.
Myself and an associate had gone to Isle of Man to watch a game (they had entered a team into the FA Vase).
Anyway, we arrived quite a bit before kick off...and upon being greeted by the Manx people, he blurts out that we're the visiting teams directors.
We get led into the boardroom, given the pre-match nosh (a lovely buffet!) and are then given gifts they had ready, pennant etc.
We exited before the real directors appeared needless to say. I've still got a lovely book on the history of Manx football 😁
 

plumbob

Vital Football Hero
#19
Just seen Notty mention the silk underwear he sent Lewis, reminded me of this from work. Weird but entertaining, not my blag for sure!!
We found out (he made it known) there's a fella at work who does a trade in used ladies panties. He buys packs of ladies underwear from Primark and sells them on the internet as worn. "Funny" thing is that he's the one that has worn them! I'm not really sure which is more disturbing, him or the one buying them. For sure, I'd like to be there if the buyer found out who had worn them 😅
An extra twist, I'm good friends with the blokes boss. We were in a meeting with the HR boss the other day, she came over scowling. "Why did you do that to me?", my mate started pissing himself laughing, she smiled, shook her head and walked off. I asked him what had gone off. He'd told the bloke that he had better clear his little external business venture with HR in case it was breaking any company rules. Of course, he didn't think he would actually tell her what he was selling🤣🤣
 

NottyImp

Vital Football Legend
#20
I can't unread that! Good lord.

Just to absolutely clear, I don't wear the underwear before I send it to Lewis. What kind of pervert do you think I am?

Mrs N. is blagging again. Our Virgin wine order has gone astray so she's trying to score some free bottles.