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Fuck. I'm devastated. But won't anyone think of the thickos? They have genuine concerns, god dammit!

That ref was shite, though. I don't like to call them out but he was poor and fussy.

Considering we are down to the absolute bare bones, with only the ancient but amazing McCleary, and youth teamers on the bench, that was a massive performance. Hugely better than last season. They fought for everything and made chances happen. It won't happen overnight but the green shoots are...

Good idea, probably for the best.

FFS "Hales". I'm too old for this.

Certainly not, Hales tricked him.

Well done. It will do a lot of good to Reform PLC's Nigel Farage's coffers, but will do absolutely no good to you or anyone else that you know. Of course, it 's a massive win because it will annoy certain fictional people who your demented newspapers have implanted in your brain. Loudly...

I hope they've retrieved the water feature from wherever it was.

Keep on believin'. One of these days we'll surely buy a player and get more than 45 minutes before knacking him.

The speciality of Farage and his ilk, unlike his thicko supporters harassing the Pakistani youth cricket team, is snideness. Propagating genuinely vile hate speech while maintaining a veneer of respectability by not doing anything terrible like swearing. As soon as there's any pushback, out...

To be brutally honest, kids these days have got a lot more interesting things to do than having to pickle or bake fucking conkers so that they can then smash them up. I used to look forward to the conker season with vibrant excitement, but if truth be told I reckon I must have had in total about...

Roone. You said that woman who got roughed up at your party conference had brought it upon herself. Explain how she did, and if you can't, apologise.

Are you going to apologise for your thug party's behaviour?

Which was fucking disgraceful, but they didn't beat him up with crutches, which you appear to consider fair do's for interrupting Nige.

Labour would just have them banged up as terrorists, much classier than bashing them with a crutch.

This is almost as good as C.B. Fry being offered the throne of Albania.

So basically she was asking for it, m'lud. FFS that is disgusting, You should be thoroughly ashamed of yourself. Lions' den indeed. Cavalcade of *****, more like.

That's not true at all. Labour, Tories and the others, as little time as I have got for them, play more or less by the accepted rules and do not rough up counter-demonstrators. Reform and all these other horrible far-right extremist parties that have suddenly popped up in almost every country...

Now that I can watch, rewatch and then watch analysis of every Gills match, it's absolutely enough and I don't want or need any more football in my life. When I was a football-obsessed, card-collecting, Shoot (incorporating Goal) reading kid I would watch everything I was able to or allowed to...

Absolute sicknotes. Discraceful. Cancel their contracts ASAP and ship them out before they manage to infect anyone else with their leadswinging, malingering boneidleness. By the way, I'm after a cordless hoover at a decent discount. Anyone got any tips?